With Godman Asaram getting arrested, Rahul Gandhi to give pravachans on his Behalf

Rahul Gandhi Delivering a speech 

either to industrialists or to Tantriks

Self-Proclaimed FraudGodman, Asaram who has been taken into police custody would soon be replaced by the Godman of the Indian National Congress, Rahul Gandhi. Both Rahul and Asaram have been known for speaking absolute Gaseous speeches and yet have been taken seriously by their sycophantic followers thus making both very much alike.

“ All this while, the nation had been calling Sri Rahul Gandhi as Rahul BABA for a reason, And now we know what the reason was. Sri Rahul BABA belongs to ItalyIndia’s royal family which in itself proves that he is a Godman. ” Spoke a Voodo doll by name Digvijay who is possessed by some Italian spirit named Sofia.

Close aids of Asaram told that, it was a tough task to find a person with influence who could preach all sorts of baseless and gaseous theories with utmost confidence. But when they heard Rahul speak on NDTV, where an old recording of his speech delivered at CII was being played, they knew that they had got the right person for the job.

“ It’s not only his immense capacity to produce highly gaseous speeches that makes Rahul perfect for the job, but we are hopeful that his close relations might help us get some free land which can help us establish our Ashram’s all across the nation.” Said a blind-follower of Asaram Bapu who had till know broken 12 jaws, 69 teeth and 72 cameras of media persons from various news channels.

Like his great Grandfather, Rahul Gandhi is also famous among kids. While the former was known as Chacha-Nehru Rahul is known as ‘Pappu’ for his funny speeches and inadvertent witty statements. But with his new achievement, Pappu might transform to Bapu.

Highly placed sources of Unrealtimes have got hold of an excerpt (given below) of one of Rahul Gandhi’s future speech, which we are still not sure would be delivered as pravachan to priests and tantriks or to a gathering of Economists and Industrialists.

“ Who am I to give the food security bill, it is God who is giving it to you. I am just the medium. Now since it is God who is doing it all, it is His responsibility to save the economy which would sink further coz of the bill. ….”

“ If Pakistan and China are invading our country our soldiers should call them brother. This would create harmony and help reduce violence and tension at the border….”

“ Scam is just a state of Mind. When the system is so fraud every scam is an opportunity given by God, today was his turn and tomorrow it could be yours….”